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Focus

by cecilnick

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about

adhd summer banger unlocked.

lyrics

I can’t focus
I don’t notice
Things all around me
Like the way that you feel

Growing up yeah everyone said
You could be what you want, yeah, whatever it is
If ya try hard enough it’ll be in your grip
So I guess I don’t want it, no I don’t (don’t) want it
Wake up and I sit in the bed
Alarm goes off and I sit in the bed
Screaming into my head I gotta move or I’m dead
I gotta get at work now but I’m still in the bed
Uh oh, I know it ain’t right
Let’s go, staying up all night
Looking into the light, a black mirror alive
Crawling in and out of eyes with a murder divine
It’s my time—and I’ll cry if I want
Throwing out rinds, rotten food that I bought
Put em into the box where I burn all my thoughts
Watching ash float by like the hand of a clock

I can’t focus
I don’t notice
Things all around me
Like the way that you feel
I can’t focus
I feel hopeless
Know that I’m sorry
But I don’t think I’ll change
No I don’t think I’ll change
I don’t think I’ll change

30 years old finally got some pills
Regulate my mind so I pay the bills
Still I’m in and out thrills running up on them hills
Yeah, living that life in between refills
So what? It’s been a couple months, yeah
No luck! Shortage in my lungs, yeah
Counting up from the bottom of what’s done
To better become un-bottled, blunted and stunned
Confused like I’m playing The Witness
Get that emotional motion sickness
Get back, mentally stacked like losing shit is my business
Find it again (where?) hiding underneath the dishes
We know what this is, we did them quizzes
Fightin’ with the coats always being dismissive
To give us the slip kid, unwritten unlisted
Awareness exists in the abyss of my lists, yeah?

I can’t focus
I don’t notice
Things all around me
Like the way that you feel
I can’t focus
I feel hopeless
Know that I’m sorry
But I don’t think I’ll change
No I don’t think I’ll change
I don’t think I’ll change

I can’t focus
I don’t notice
Things all around me
Like the way that you feel
I can’t focus
I feel hopeless
Know that I’m sorry
But I don’t think I’ll change
I’m not stuck in my ways
I’m just trapped in this brain

credits

released July 7, 2023
music and lyrics: cecilnick
background vocals, additional synths: chris johnson
mixing and mastering: mono no audio
art direction: cecil decker

cecilnick will return in SLEEP ERA, October 6th 2023.

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cecilnick Columbia, South Carolina

wizard of weird

cecil decker

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